Abstract
Art has been the catalyst to an existential investigation into how I exist in the world while seeking truth and meaning. My main concern regarding higher education was how the work would change, would I become a better artist and would my intentions shift significantly? Did the future hold some kind of resolve, offering myself and the work greater meaning? Two years of practicing studio art and being in the academic art world; unveiled psychic unrest; tests of mental strength and capacity; existing in a world of utter confusion and freedom. I’ve returned to where I started, yet with a conversion of consciousness. I don’t know what a “better” artist is, however, my work holds greater meaning. It seems that the strife somehow elicits fulfillment, while the successes and failures bring forth a dialogue that assist further development and add value to both the work and my person; offering potential for meaning. Higher education is humanizing, changing the work through a steady process of reduction, getting it closer to the essence of my intent. But concepts surrounding irresolution create the work, suggesting resolve to be unattainable.