Abstract
Autoethnography is a recent method of research in Writing Studies. I present an emergent theory from my published thesis autoethnography. Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder increasingly is recognized as a form of neurodiversity in academic circles. My forum poster derives from my autoethnography methods: reflexive journaling, artifact collection, and recursive reflection. I arrived at a theory I described as Pentacle Writing as a neurodiverse approach to writing that is an intentional, disruptive outward manifestation mirroring the innerworld of my OCD. I came to realize my diagnosis shapes my composing process. I reflected on neurodiversity in composing processes during the revision process noticing my effort to assimilate to “neurotypical” writing mores. I first enact Pentacle Writing in the intentionally disruptive poster presentation compared to academic mores and, later, I frame this process as Pentacle Writing when discussing my research at this Fall Forum. Living the writing, identifying obstacles, and describing contributions in my research shows my relationship to the culture of disability. I synthesize my experiences as a patient in Exposure and Response Prevention and Internal Family Systems therapy with my studies in the classroom. Medical and mental health spheres intertwine with my academic and personal spaces as a cohesive person beyond just researcher or patient. My study of rhetorical analysis provides a unique perspective into self-(psycho)analysis of my experiences with disability and ableism. Clinical language in the medical model pervades aspects of my life in the psychiatric medical model of mental healthcare. My self-(psycho)analysis suggests an alternative rhetoric to Western rhetoric in psychiatric, medical, and academic spaces. I focus on therapeutic modalities (ERPT, IFS, and psychedelic-assisted psychotherapy), models of healthcare (medical vs social), psychoanalytic researchers (Freud, Jung, and Schwartz), and psychological theory (Jungian psychology) because I am transitioning to interdisciplinary psychology doctoral research. My research voices parts of myself ableism silenced as an act of social justice. Inclusive narratives are needed to add to the voices that have been silenced.